“Cloud Atlas” Trailer

Just watched the newly released trailer for ‘Cloud Atlas’:

The book’s great, if a little overwrought, but the film looks desperately ambitious.

At least it’ll be an interesting mess, though. Isn’t that right, Tom?

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“A Thousand Words” Trailer

Seems like Eddie Murphy’s new movie is about someone with only 1000 words left to speak.

It’s a shame none of them were “I’ll pass on this.”


“The Iron Lady” Trailer

Mamma Mia! The Mummy Returns!

Get the garlic crushed.


“Romantics Anonymous” Trailer

Sometimes following every cliche in the “How To Make a Film Trailer” textbook can be fruitful.

Looking forward to seeing this. Looks like how my parents got together. Minus the whole owning a chocolate factory in France thing.


Piranha 3DD Trailer

From the looks of this trailer, ‘Piranha 3DD’ is going to be more gleefully insane than expected.

This time around the chlorine-adapted killer fish are residents in a water-park filled with big breasted models. And David Hasselhoff is there. As is Ving Rhames, who now has guns for legs.

There’s so much disbelief to suspend here, but I’m really having the hardest time getting past the whole hot chicks hanging out at a public water-park thing. I’m sure they know people who own pools.


The Muppets Movie Trailer

Well, this is what all cinephiles have been waiting for: the latest Muppets film.

From the trailer, it looks surprisingly interesting, more or less. Sure, the involvement of Jack Black doesn’t exactly scream “integrity,” but their premise seems cute and likable, much like the furry characters themselves. Sure, there are some chickens doing a musical rendition of Cee-Lo Green’s “Fuck Forget You,” but beyond that, it maintains a timeless quality that its predecessors had.

Also worth noting is a late appearance by Chris Cooper, who I desperately hope is reprising his role as the violent closeted homosexual from ‘American Beauty‘.


Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close Trailer

Losing a parent in the 9/11 attacks is an outright tragedy, but in the new film ‘Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close’ it becomes even more heart-breaking when that adult is Tom Hanks. He seems like such a cool dad.  Al Qaeda will pay in blood!

I hope this isn’t just a cheap Hollywood cash-in on a national disaster. Eric Roth wrote the screenplay, who has churned out scripts like ‘Forrest Gump’ and ‘The Curious Case of Benjamin Button’, which delve too deep into sentiment in a way that hijacks the narrative arc. But we can only judge so far the trailer (overtly manipulative by their very nature), and the concept does seem interesting: a child dealing with the loss of a parent through the power of legacy, not denial. For example, he searches five boroughs of Manhatten in hope of finding the lock to which the mysterious key his Dad left behind fits. Of course, this only appears plausible because his Dad’s two-time Oscar-winning Tom Hanks; he’s so polite even his name abbreviates to “T.Hanks.”

When his son shows him a pebble though, he says “You rock!” in the trailer. C’mon, is that it? Nothing else? Is that the limit of Hollywood’s wordplay?

Here’s my alternative:

“You want cheesy geology puns? Give me a minute, son. I’ll dig some up.

*clears throat*

It’s so nice to see my child with such a solid foundation.

*silence*

From your stony expression, I can tell you didn’t like the joke.”